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Here are letters, ideas, links, comments and complaints we have received over the past months.

LINKS:

Find recent information regarding funeral homes, cremations and memorial services at Funeral Homes And Memorial Services
http://www.funeralandcemeteryinfo.org

 

LETTERS: 

November 7, 2005

The following is an exchange of emails between A Funeral In B.C. and Ms Debbie Pazdera, a daughter arranging her mother's funeral. The mother had purchased a pre-paid funeral but Ms Pazdera discovered something was amiss:

Sent: Monday, November 07, 2005 4:14 PM
Subject: Immediate Disposition

I am having a little trouble understanding the procedures required by law.  My mother recently passed away and had pre-arranged through Valley View Memorial Gardens in Surrey in 1995 (and prepaid) for an adult cremation fee, cremation urn/vault, cremation interment.  The Funeral Home is now telling me I will have to pay an additional amount of around $2,000.00  to $2,200.00 to cover the cost of transferring the deceased to the mortuary, providing the combustible container, getting the permits and preparing the death certificate.  Please help me understand how this could be possibly true when your website found me a provider in Surrey that would cost $967.00 plus taxes which would include all of the above (excluding the urn/vault and interment).    Any assistance you can provide me would be greatly appreciated.

Yours truly,

Debbie Pazdera

Our Response:

Dear Ms Pazdera,

First, please accept our sympathy on the loss of your mother. Unfortunately, the situation you find yourself in is not uncommon.
 
Too frequently pre-paid funeral contracts result in these misunderstandings which inevitably are to the benefit of the funeral provider. You can call upon the Business Practices and Consumer Protection Agency of British Columbia http://www.bpcpa.ca/legislation/repealed_statutes_and_regulations.htm, but I would suspect that would be a long and probably not satisfying action to take.
 
What it sounds like is that the funeral provider sold your mother the accessory items related to a cremation -- the urn and urn wall interment, for example. Often people do not understand that's what they are purchasing, not the actual cremation and necessary details like the cremation container itself. And, of course, upon their deaths, it is too late to change or correct that misunderstanding.
 
It is not clear from your email whether the cremation has already taken place. If not, you could ask another provider to intervene. You could, for example, ask a provider like Personal Alternative Funerals (604 596 2215), Kearny Funeral Home (604 542 2232) or perhaps Wiebe & Jeske (604 857 0711) to remove your mother's remains from Valley View and undertake the disposition. You would, of course, be subject to the fee of the intervening provider and I wouldn't be surprised if Valley View found a way to extract a fee as well, but it sounds as if it might be less than the charges Valley View is demanding.
 
I would like to post your letter on our site as an example of the perils of pre-paying funeral plans with certain providers (over 35,000 people visit www.afuneralinbc.com annually, and the site receives over 450,000 hits worldwide), but I would do that only with your permission. Once your letter is on site, I would email the provider in question and ask for an explanation. However, that will not solve this financial and emotional insult to you, I'm afraid.
 
I understand this must be an unsettling experience, and I'm sorry there is not more I can do to assist you.
 
Best Regards,
Myles Murchison
myles@afuneralinbc.com
 
 Ms Pazdera replied:

Thank you Myles for your response.  Just to clarify, my mother has paid the actual cremation fee but the transfer expenses, permits, combustible container and certificate fees have not been paid.  She has not yet been cremated.  I am going to pursue getting another provider to intervene.  Thank you so much for your help.

Please accept this as your permission to post my e-mail on your site.

I would like to add that my mother paid these fees in 1995, they have had her funds for 10 years.  Today, it would have been beneficial to have not made any advance preparations.  How sad when she really believed “everything was taken care of and we wouldn’t have to worry about a thing."

 

MISC. SERVICES:

June 17, 2003

Good Endings Program

I am a Thanatologist of over 26 years, working in hospitals, hospices, and nursing homes. I am the creator of the Good Endings program, dealing with caring for the dying nursing home resident. We have received much acclaim from the media around the country. I have written 3 books and released a music CD for the program. Please see our website for more information- www.goodendings.net.
 
Thank you,
Donalyn Gross, Ph.D., LCSW,CMP

 

March 12, 2003
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